The Tribune

By IVOINE INGRAHAM

“Neither a borrower nor a lender be” is advice from Shakespeare’s Hamlet. It suggests it’s best to avoid lending and borrowing money to maintain financial independence and avoid potential conflicts. Many of us work and plan our finances and budgets to live within our means. We work, prioritise, care for our responsibilities, save, and do without.

It is too bad that many of us have become hustlers and parasites. We have no shame or conscience. We beg anyone and throw a tantrum if we do not get what we want. Politics has exposed the shamelessness of those who unconsciously beg repeatedly, even if they have already benefited. It’s sickening!

We have developed a skill of spending what we do not have. Without conscious thought, people repeatedly spend every dime, go next door, and borrow groceries from neighbours. Sadly, we hate people who have, envy them, and call them hogs if they do not satisfy our unquenchable thirst for things.

Unfortunately, it is practised by some who make no plans to progress but live in an ad hoc world, flying by the seat of their pants. We go shopping when we need an onion, a small loaf of bread, and a quarter-pound of sausage. We do not see the wisdom in getting groceries for a few days or a week. This behaviour has nothing to do with whether we have enough money; it is all about doing what we saw our parents do.

On the other hand, our children watch us, and now we have our girls who have become so many things, and our boys believe they can get what they want without working for it. Our society has become a people who want something for nothing; worse, we are fiscally irresponsible.

Priority is priority

For instance, we could allocate a certain percentage of our income to essentials, another to savings, and the rest to discretionary spending. This way, we can ensure we’re living within our means and not running out of money before we run out of week. This simple act of planning can empower us and put us in control of our financial situation, making us feel capable and in charge.

Our tendency to keep up with the Joneses forced us to live above our means. We developed expensive habits, so we borrowed from friends and family with the plan never to honour our debt. This caused us to borrow from institutions, knowing we can’t or will not repay. Now, we are a nuisance and have worn out our welcome.

Instead of trying to keep up with others, we could focus on our financial health and well-being. This might mean attending events in clothes we own or finding free or low-cost activities to enjoy with friends.

Our every move is a competition with others. We use our overhead money to party, dine out, visit Fish Fry with friends, drink shot after shot to boast about, and then face eviction the next day. This pattern is passed down through the generations. We can’t afford the lifestyle we pretend to have. Our fantasy of eating steak and lobster on a sausage salary has dug a hole, sometimes insurmountable to get out of.

So what do we do? We beg from everyone, and we always become a nuisance hustling. All shun us because they know we have become parasites. Then, a head game is played on relatives and friends designed to make them feel obligated to help.

Our children are placed in schools we cannot afford because it has a psychological effect if we brag about our children attending ‘private school’ as if the public schools are inferior. These self-inflicting wounds go on to be catastrophic as they relate to our mental state from all this pressure to be accepted. It’s crucial to realise that succumbing to societal pressures can lead to financial ruin and mental distress.

We allow festivities like Christmas and birthdays to force us to celebrate like we see others do. We spend every dime on presents for people, especially family, who don’t like us.

In our foolish stupor, we spend every dime we save for eleven months in December, and some even borrow more from the bank. So much so that every January, we start the new year in the red, behind in our rent and utilities, with no red cent to rub against the other. But we learn nothing because we don’t want to be left out; we must keep up.

Since the last paycheck was on the fifteenth of December, we ate wind pies until the end of January, six weeks later, which is the highest level of asininity imaginable.

The most inhumane part of these many horror scenarios is that we are forced to degrade ourselves because of vulnerability and desperation. Exploitation is employed by those who use the opportunity to pounce, but all of this could be avoided.

We insist that we must be part of the crowd. If we cannot afford to spend on necessary things and plan according to our salaries, then we will not belittle ourselves because of our insecurities. Instead, we will take charge of our finances, plan wisely, and live a life of dignity and respect. Breaking free from societal pressures can liberate us and allow us to live a life of independence and self-respect, bringing a sense of relief and freedom.

Our hustling turns us into parasites, and the truth is, more people have continuously contributed to this parasitic behavior. Borrowing without the intention of paying back has severe repercussions. Loan sharks do not take kindly to delinquent customers, and the consequences of such actions can be dire, leading to a life of constant fear and stress. These consequences should serve as a stark reminder of the importance of financial responsibility.

While our burrowing may not be from organised institutions, the truth is that when we burrow, we should hasten to pay back because we do not know what sacrifices we made to lend.

The culture of destroying your finances through poor planning, then going to the government for assistance and blaming them for your inconsistencies is not only ungodly but also dishonest.

Facing reality will help us stop pretending to be who we are not and will cause us to live sensibly, covering our overhead first and making provisions to be more strategic. Keeping up with others would only trick us into competing, where we will only become losers. This emphasis on facing reality will make us feel grounded and sensible.

Be wise!