The Tribune

Courage is not the absence of fear, but the realisation that some things are more important than fear. Standing up for yourself is most certainly one of those things. And by standing up for yourself, I mean standing up for your own sense of self, for what you believe and for the way you desire to live your life.

The difficulty here is that it is impossible to stand up for a self that you don't even know. Hence, the adage 'know thyself' is the gift of all gifts that you can give to yourself. Of course this whole 'knowing thyself' crusade takes time and effort. More importantly, it takes commitment. And it is at this intersection of effort and commitment where most fall short. They are either unwilling or unable to take the path of self-discovery.

The other challenge is it is so much easier to just go along to get along; living according to someone else's agenda. I believe that if you don't set your own agenda you become a pawn on someone else's; plain and simple. Having said that, what is your agenda? Are you taking time to discover who you really are? What are your unique gifts and talents?

Let's be real, the road less travelled is not for the faint-hearted. The group mentality, which is the wide road, does in fact produce some external achievement. However, only the narrow path can lead you to your true self; to your power within. And this power path takes courage and commitment.

I realise that it's not easy to escape the commonplace 'monkey see, monkey do' mentality that may be closing in all around you. Yet you must be forthright and deliberate in carving out your unique path. I'm a firm believer in the notion that life in and of itself is not about acquisition and accumulation. Rather, this life is really about gaining inner understanding and living with your own sense of purpose.

Despite this higher level notion, people everywhere are preconditioned to chase the next new shiny thing. The irony is, given this paradigm of addiction to instant gratification, there will always some new shiny things to chase. And the more you get, the more you want to get. Still, in all your getting you must also get some understanding of who you are and where you stand in this world of possibilities.

Ask yourself whether the things you invest time in pursuing add any real value to your life. Do they help you develop any new skill set or solve any of your life problems? The answer is a resounding 'no'. At best, they are just some more stuff for you to look at while it looks back at you. Making the decision to stand up for yourself pushes you to reevaluate the things that matters and why. You stop looking for shallow victories and begin to see life from a more meaningful perspective.

Your time is seen as a precious commodity and you guard it fiercely. Standing up for yourself empowers you to experience your life on a whole new level. You pay more attention to what you give your attention to. Your life becomes not so much about the pursuit of happiness but rather the expression of your happiest within.

Even so, this standing up for yourself is not something you have to do. It is a choice. The way I see it, either you stand up for yourself and own your power or somebody else will. They will speak on your behalf; telling you what you should or shouldn't do with your life.

Do not allow yourself to remain a spectator in your own life. Get out front and embrace the journey of self-discovery. It is that personal quest towards a deeper understanding. After all, what's the point of gaining the world but never understanding the purpose of your soul?

Life is not lived on the surface of the ocean. To experience real living, you must dive deeper towards the ocean floor. The deeper you dive the more empowered you become.

Remember, life is huge! It is host to endless planets and galaxies; much of which our minds cannot even fathom. Standing up for yourself doesn't just give you the courage live your truth. It empowers and expands your perception. You become born again to a new found freedom.

Leader to leader, let today be your first step to stand up for yourself. It is the one surefire way to live with more clarity and meaning. In so doing you propel yourself towards living an empowered life. Yes, you definitely can do it!

What do you think? Please send your comments to coaching242@yahoo.com or call 429-6770.

• Michelle M Miller is a certified life coach, communication and leadership expert. Visit www.talktomichellemiller.com or call 1-888-620-7894; mail can be sent to PO Box CB-13060.