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A Comic's View: The 'Was Gonna' Govt

By INIGO 'NAUGHTY' ZENICAZELAYA

This comes a bit late but I guess now is as good a time as any to congratulate the Progressive Liberal Party (PLP) on winning the 2017 Bahamas General Election.

Didn’t you hear? Apparently the Free National Movement (FNM) is moving to rent the Town Centre Mall to serve as our General Post Office. And despite public outcry and the very bad political optics of the situation (one of the beneficial owners of the Mall is a sitting Cabinet Minister) the FNM has a really convenient response; the PLP “was gonna” do the same thing.

That’s right, our new proxy PLP “Was Gonna” government that calls itself an FNM administration has found a comfortable (if hypocritical) position when pressed on its decision making.

Ask this government a question and predictably the answers are now the same:

Why are you raising VAT on the people? The PLP was gonna do it.

Why are you pushing this ludicrous Oban deal? The PLP was gonna do it.

Why are you looking to rent the Town Centre Mall? The PLP was gonna do it.

This excuse has become so common that if you aren’t paying attention you may not notice how regularly it’s deployed.

On the Vat question, this “PLP was gonna” excuse was so rampant it forced former Prime Minister Christie to come out of his self-imposed (but much appreciated) exile to protest, “I’m really surprised because we never had any intention of raising it to 12 percent.”

On the Oban question, Prime Minister Minnis brought up former Minister for Grand Bahama Michael Darville’s tour of the proposed site for the Oban project.

During the hot debate in the House with opposition MP Glenys Hanna-Martin, Doc Minnis actually said, “And yet the member of Parliament for Englerston referred to the principals of Oban Energies LLC as a ‘cornucopia of crooks’. Well, these are the same cornucopia of crooks with whom some of her cabinet colleagues, and the PLP government sat down and negotiated.

“Furthermore, one of them visited the site in Grand Bahama (which the nation can see on a video), approved the project, and was about to sign the heads of agreement.”

In that same debate – in what can only be called a moment of striking cognitive dissonance (or as the elders would say, “having no shame”) - Doc smugly added, “But we are now the government.”

Are you really, though?

Because this week we have yet another PLP “was gonna” moment.

In defending this latest controversy around renting a building partially owned by a sitting Cabinet Minister, and other possible Post Office options, the PM has once again fixed his mouth to say, “I don’t want to get into details because what’s going to happen is more details will come out during the debate, but what you will find out is that at a particular point in time even the PLP had selected the facility and they had also already drawn the plans.”

For the uninitiated, that “Doc talk” word salad basically translates to: But..but..but..the PLP was gonna!

The Minister of Immigration, Brent Symonette, told this newspaper he has no knowledge of and was not involved in the Cabinet discussion surrounding the use of his Town Centre Mall property as he is currently “out of the country”.

Yet here is poor, poor, pitiful Brent once again caught in another politically devastating controversy involving conflict of interest because his leader, the Prime Minister, is bent on doing everything he thinks the PLP would have done.

To make his case, Doc even gave us this laughable example: “Let me ask you a simple question. If Bill Gates was a Bahamian Microsoft with the best possible computers for your country in terms of e-Bahamas and internet systems, and Bill Gates was also a member of Parliament, would you deny the country the use of Microsoft because he’s a member of Parliament when he declares, and you know (he is) the best in taking you to first world status?”

This argument fails on so many levels.

First of all, back in the day, Microsoft was hit with a federal anti-trust lawsuit to stop that kind of monopoly implied. There are several companies that can claim to be ‘the best.’ (And conflict of interest free, probably).

Second of all, Bill Gates, the second richest man alive, recently turned down a political office because he felt it was “not a good use of [his] time”. (Can you blame him?)

Third of all, the Gates’ have pledged to give away most of their money in life or in death to charity. Ninety billion. NINETY. BILLION. (Show me a “Bahamian Bill Gates” who will give away ninety thousand and I’ll show you a Chickcharney.)

Lastly, your example, for these reasons and for the logical fallacies of appeal to probability, equivocation, false dilemma, etc., etc. is what Bahamians generally call “talking fool”.

And yes, it is a serious ting!

The irony of all this madness is this is supposed to be “The People’s Time”.

Why would the PM keep doing everything “the worst government since Majority Rule” would have done?

Did someone tell him “The People” wanted PLP Lite?

Minnis once said ‘out his own mouth’ that “The PLP way is for them and them alone. That party has no philosophy or ideology other than this: get the money.”

Yet here we find ourselves with the FNM fiendishly “following fashion”.

Wake up FNM. Or soon your “was gonna” government is gonna be gone too.

Until next week I will leave you with the words of Edward R Murrow : “A nation of sheep, will beget a government of wolves.”

Comments

TalRussell 5 months ago

Love you Ma Comrade "Naughty," Hopefully such just in time delivery words wisdom will finally awoken the 91,409 still walking around with purple ink they thumps to remind them the betrayal of trust beginning day one this
side 10 May 2017., It's time People's Purple Movement rise to the moment..

.. the words of Edward R Murrow : “A nation of sheep, will beget a government of wolves.” ......

...........////// https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ao9J...">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ao9J...

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TalRussell 5 months ago

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by TalRussell

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licks2 5 months ago

I must be silly too but I don't think that naughty is too smart. . .rather he dumb dumb!! I een know what he talking about. . .hell. . . naughty should have been reading listening and comprehension skills. It is called comparative reasoning or logic!!

Comparative reasoning establishes the importance of something by comparing it against something else. The size of the gap between the things compared indicates importance. Compare against a high standard to make something look undesirable. Yall gone and make the PM and his people learn high brow skills then bring it around yinna high school drop out mentality and cause yall to talk all kind of dumb crap like naughty did!!

Naughty ya priest may tell you like this. . .since they tend to use CR usually as explaining metaphor. . . like when Jesus said "as Jonah was in the belly of the fish for three days so shall the son of man be". . ."as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wildness so must the son of man be lifted up". . . 'break down this temple and I will raise it in three days"! Naughty your response is like the "but this temple took 46 years to build. . .how you will raise it back in three days". . .they did not get it!! Yoon get it ether there playin the "trune" boy!

A metaphor is a figure of speech that refers to something as being the same as another thing for rhetorical effect. It may provide clarity or identify hidden similarities between two ideas. Where a simile compares two items, a metaphor directly equates them, and does not use "like" or "as" as does a simile.

I will tell you Mr, Giggle man. . .Doc "bouf" you aye. . .hahahahahahahahahaha!

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IAmOne 5 months ago

Licks 2 I know you are trying to ‘sound dumb’ or jungaliss but you really don’t have to try so hard since you obviously have natural stupidity in your arsenal.

All your obfuscating doesn’t cover the fact that it’s old cronies like you that keep these visionless leaders around. All your running on about comparative thinking when all you have to do is admit this post office nonsense stinks of conflict of interest. Bet you didn’t comparatively think about that. SMH

Keep up the good work Naughty bro. Not your fault these blind deaf and dumb Minnis followers can’t follow sense. Besides Lions don’t care about the opinions of sheep. Baaaaaahhhh!!!!

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sheeprunner12 4 months, 4 weeks ago

But ........... even the blind, deaf and dumb are glad that the PLP is not the Government now .............. and should not be the Government again .......... until everyone who served with Perry are 6 feet under.

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licks2 4 months, 4 weeks ago

I have natural stupidness as my arsenal. . .yet you perceive that I am "trying to play dumb". . . ????????????????? What you saying here fella? As for the obfuscation you say I am doing. . . I won't waste time "diggin up peanuts" with you. . .any fool can see what I wrote! And you tell me I encouraging corrupt FNM action while you telling naughty to stay dumb and keep shaming himself!! Yall PLPs really do talk stuff sometimes nah!

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birdiestrachan 4 months, 4 weeks ago

Naughty the columnist is now experiencing the worst Government since Majority rule in living colours doc and the FNM Government As they say the peoples time voters spoke it on themselves.

What judgment, What clarity. What wisdom and what understanding and What basic common sense? Naughty What does it say about you folks. You all have the Government you all deserve.

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licks2 4 months, 4 weeks ago

I did not say naughty een experiencing the worse government he ever had. . .I said he dumb and don't have a substantial grasps of the higher order thinking dialogue he attempted to engaged in!! For the rest of your statement. . .go kick rocks. . .don't waste my time!!

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IAmOne 4 months, 4 weeks ago

sheeprunner I agree I never want that old PLP crony crew back ever again. That doesn’t mean we have to swallow all the garbage this new crew wants to feed us. Right is right and wrong is wrong no matter what color shirt ya wearing.

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Greentea 4 months, 4 weeks ago

Naughty, these days I think you mean "the second worst government since Majority Rule” cause after Lighthouse Point this Minnis gov vying hard for "wurse"

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TalRussell 4 months, 4 weeks ago

I think all Comrade "Naughty" is saying is, first PM Minnis and KP - does needs lay on PeoplePublic's table, exactly how richly generous they pledged cash and concessions over span many years out PeoplesPublicPurse - before Disney would agree hand over their final $25 million closing cheque to the owners Lighthouse Point Island.... since we damn well know Minnis and KP - offered zero cash and concessions to One Eleuthera...... and if I were Disney, I'd make damn sure none signatures affixed are fake cause the entire financial and business world does knows about government's shady signatory reputation. {There is no making up history shady signatory }.

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licks2 4 months, 4 weeks ago

Then if that what he means. . .THEN LET HIM SAY SO!!! All I am saying is that he don't have a clue about what he attempted to say. . .he sounded like a dumb "sitting-in-the-back-of-the-class" . . . who just making fun of people to be funny. . .all the time not seeing how stupid he sounds. . .or dumb he himself is!! As for that other nonsense you putting out. . .go kick rocks!!!

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