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When the carer becomes the patient

Alice Mudzemeti

Alice Mudzemeti

By JEFFARAH GIBSON

Tribune Features Writer

jgibson@tribunemedia.net

RADIATION therapist Alice Mudzemeti could never imagine having the shoe on the other foot. She went from treating and offering support to cancer patients, to becoming one herself.

Her breast cancer diagnosis in September 2017, brought Alice's life to a screeching halt. She had spent her work days at The Medical Pavilion offering care to patients and trying to raise their spirits, only to end up needing the same.

"Being on the other side made me realise that I was also human hence therefore could also undergo the same struggle I had seen my patients go through. I recalled the pain, the struggle and the triumph. This helped me prepare mentally for the journey I was embarking on. None of what I went through was a surprise, I knew what to expect. Not that it made the journey easier but just better equipped me," she said.

Alice was diagnosed with cancer after noticing an unusual lump in her breast.

"The first thing that came to my mind was that 'let it not be breast cancer'. I gave myself differential diagnosis from engorgement, having weaned my baby from breastfeeding only a few months prior to infection or some other benign lump."

But her worst nightmare was confirmed after a mammogram revealed a mass, followed by breast ultrasound and biopsy.

Since the diagnosis Alice has undergone chemotherapy, mastectomy and radiotherapy at the Pavilion.

"A choice of where to get treatment was a no-brainer as I had confidence in our system. It was great comfort knowing I would be taken care of by medical professionals I knew very well and whose expertise I did not doubt. After all I would be in the comfort of my home and be able to resume my normal duties. I would do the school run, go to work and get treated on the same day."

Two weeks into the chemotherapy, Alice started to experience changes in her body. One morning while in the shower her hair began shedding. In Alice's whole life she had never worn a wig, but found it to be a useful accessory thereafter.

"As part of my coping with the changes in body image, I adopted wearing red lipstick. Not only did it boost my confidence, it also spoke to me that I was bold and fearless and that I would beat cancer. I had further body changes to deal with following mastectomy and radiotherapy," said Alice.

"I recently went for a procedure at one facility where the technician attending to me remarked that the skin in the radiated area was so dark yet the skin on the other side was so beautiful. At the back of my mind I was thinking, 'do you know what that can do a patient in my state psychologically?'

"I was totally dismayed though to hear that from a health professional who should know better what not to say to a patient. If you are going through the same experience as I am, do not let ignorant people's remarks become your reality. Just embrace the changes and cover up if you must."

While she would never choose a diagnosis of breast cancer to gain deeper insight into what her patients were going through, she believes her own personal experience has enabled her to help them at a greater level.

"This was my time to go through what I had seen hundreds of patients go through over the years. One thing which dawned on me was that even though I was facing this storm, no storm lasts forever. I quickly went back to my faith and I knew that for me to be able to make it on this journey I had to put my total trust in God, lay it all on the alter and not lean on my own understanding. Unfortunately in practice, the patients who tend to stick on the mind are those who do not do well. That is a much smaller number compared to those who do well. This was a battle field of the mind. I had to consciously feed my mind with positive energy and avoid anxious pre-occupation," said Alice.

"Music was a great distraction for me, I played happy celebratory music. Even though I was in this season I consciously chose to keep going, after all life is like a disco, even if the music changes you just keep dancing. Continue to enjoy the things you enjoyed even before the diagnosis. There are time though when you can be physically challenged for some activities, find the next thing to enjoy. When I was too weak to walk on the beach I still went to just sit on the bench and enjoy the scenery and catch some fresh air."

Alice continues to rely on prayer, meditation, reflection, church attendance, and consultation with spiritual leaders to keep her hope. She noted all of those things together can play a significant role in helping to deal with thoughts of mortality.

"During clinical practice patients often express the need for help with overcoming fears associated with a cancer diagnosis, finding hope, meaning in life and someone to talk to about finding peace of mind. Attending church meetings thus significantly helps improve on psychological wellbeing through self awareness, effective coping and adjustment to stress, building relationships and connectedness with others, increased faith, sense of empowerment and confidence, living with meaning and hope following a cancer diagnosis. Where faith and hope grows, miracles manifest. This experience has given me a better outlook to life and greatly deepened my faith."

But one of the most important things she has learn over was the value of family, friends and relationships in costing with breast cancer.

"It is greatly important to surround yourself with people who will impact positively on this journey, people who can lift your spirits when you are low, help with tasks and chores when you are physically challenged. However, it must be noted that not everyone in your circle will know the appropriate words to say at all times. Help the people around you know how to help you and do not let negativity from those who are ignorant become your reality. Sometimes a hug is all I could use to help me cope or for someone to get me to do activities which do not remind that I am a cancer patient," she said.

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